The Gift of Discouragement

Thriving Life

Discouragement can feel awful. It’s heavy in the body and it can seem like your life force is being siphoned. (Sometimes it is!) It can be enmeshed with grief, anger, disappointment, confusion, despair, and other painful emotions. The thoughts that pervade your mind can be stuck in a mental looping of futility. You may replay a story: “I’ve tried and tried and nothing seems to work. I have persevered and feel like I’m still where I started.” Or, “I feel like I take 2 steps forward and 3 back.” You may find it hard to take one more. You may feel like you just don’t have it in you to keep going. You may feel hopeless.

I hear you!! I feel you! I really do. I have felt this darkness personally, and I’ve been feeling this discouragement recently in the collective consciousness. And I hear this a lot from clients with respect to their healing journey too: “I have tried so many things and nothing changes.” The journey can feel hard, and like mining through endless layers. If this sounds familiar to you, it definitely does not mean that you have exhausted all the possibilities of causation, but it’s understandable that this would feel discouraging. You are not alone.

However, this is when you can turn on yourself and think that there must be something wrong with you. Either you aren’t good enough or you have missed something. This is the cycle of shame: “I try but it doesn’t change, so I just keep trying harder and it still doesn’t change, and so that must mean…” This is a distortion in thinking, firstly because it’s the wounded self/ego that is holding this self-perception, and secondly, because it’s predicated on the ego’s need for control.

There is a deep negative agenda on the planet to keep you in discouragement. Imagine that someone invades your house, and takes away your power, and worse, sets it up so that you keep giving away your power without your full knowledge that you are doing so. But something feels not quite right, so you keep trying to find a way out of your dilemma, but nothing seems to work because you don’t have the full picture. Yes, this could lead to discouragement. This is why educating ourselves and doing our clearing work is vital – to restore our memories and consciousness to our full awareness in the best way we can.

Without question, our cells remember the alien invasion and the enslavement that has been unjustly put upon us. If we are of the Christ families, we can feel the heartache of failed spiritual missions in the past, the pain from power abuses, and the suffering. We can perhaps feel futility when we look around at the current limitations that are being reinforced to separate us from nature and our Divine intelligence, poison us with chemicals, monitor our moves, and punish any questioning of “authorities”. The negative controllers create the problem, wait for our reaction and offer the solution – a trap. Humans have experienced repeating patterns of limitation for a long time. But this can’t be a justification for allowing discouragement. The only question to ask yourself is, “Do I let them keep taking my freedom by buying into the plan to dis-courage me?”



Now, when you are feeling heavy in despair, you can feel reluctant and resistant to looking deeper within yourself to see what you personally are holding in your energy field. It may feel like too much. Perhaps you just want to give up. ‘Giving up’ is entanglement with the pain body that just doesn’t see a way out. It’s the epitome of powerlessness. This is the core of the discouragement and it can be a dangerous state to be if you cannot find any impetus to move forward and change what you are feeling. You may believe that you are not worthy of that.

However, as long as you have breath you have life, and you have choice. So, while you can feel despair, and even hear yourself say “I give up” or “I’m not going to try any more”, recognize the spark of hope in this: your ego is giving up! See this truth. Your ego is dying, but your soul is seeking the reconnection to Source. The latter is vastly different from giving up. It’s surrender.



The glimmer of Light is found underneath the discouragement, so you have to be willing to meet the discouragement to discover where it leads and what other possibilities exist beyond it. You have to want to know that truth more than you want to avoid the discomfort. Only by taking this chance can you recognize that you are much more than the ego and the slave to the controlling program. Only your Spirit can provide this.

Everything in life is always moving and in a state of flux, so even the worst of circumstances and feelings will shift. This means that you can resist, distract, or try to get quick and instant relief and take yourself back to old habits. But if you go through the experience, with gentle conscious welcome, you may just find something new. By being vulnerable without attaching to the ego story, your pain can yield to authentic life! The deeper you go, the brighter the Light.

'Open your heart'

‘Open your heart’

Nobody can make this choice for you. Some part of you, even if it seems like a small fraction of you, has to want this change, has to want to expand. Place your attention on this part of you, and trust, because without doubt, the opportunity to reclaim wholeness with your Spirit awaits there. This reconnection can never be taken away from you. You are never energetically separate from Spirit because you are infinite in your consciousness. You are infinite possibilities. Discouragement is only temporarily forgetting that you are that.

Here are some suggestions for how to move through discouragement:

♥ Be willing to take responsibility for your energy field and what you are experiencing. Even if it is the collective energy, if you are feeling it, it’s still up to you to change your frequency.

♥ Call it out – discouragement is ego and it’s limiting you. The moment you hear yourself say, “I give up” or you feel like you just want to give up, acknowledge that this is ego. This is not who you really are and it’s part of the program. Even if ego has plenty of good reasons why your discouragement is justifiable, it’s still ego. And it will have a story that keeps you in suffering. So just notice your pain rather than bolstering it. You are not your emotions and you are not your thoughts. You are not your pain body and not your body. You are an eternal being. Affirm that.

♥ Be willing to meet the feeling of discouragement. If you avoid dealing with it, it persists. Nor is it about wallowing in the feeling of discouragement. There’s a good chance you have already allowed that, and victim consciousness would then be leading the way. Consciously acknowledging the emotion is the first step to healing. Then feel the discouragement. It’s okay – you’re an evolving human. Feel its sensation in your body. Hold compassion for your wounded inner child and breathe with him/her, just allowing yourself to be with it fully, rather than trying to move away from the discomfort. Are you willing to tell the truth about it? To seek truth rather than seek relief or rescue? Then if need be, inquire, “What’s my fear?” Observe whatever surfaces – it’s okay. Feel it, accept it and give it life again by bringing Light to it.

♥ Ultimately, discouragement is about resistance to your highest expression in alignment with Divine will. So there has to be a willingness to give up the need for ego control. Turn toward your God Within, whatever that means for you. If ‘God’ feels out of reach choose kindness, humility, being of service to others, gentleness, calm, a practice of ‘now” moment awareness, or any other values or practices that direct your behaviour so that you bring yourself into greater alignment with who you really are in your heart and your inner peace. Make this purposeful in your life. Your ego cannot help you here. So this is surrender. Stop refusing your Spirit and let The Creator be in charge. Let God love you. Let life force flow through you and help you flourish in your potential, your inherent strengths, your beauty, your authentic heart. Be. As the poet Rumi said, “Give your life to the one who already owns your breath and your moments.”

hilo bay♥ If you cannot understand what is happening in your life that is discouraging you, simply claim that: “I do not understand why this is happening, but I trust in my Higher Self and the higher purpose of this in my life. I am moving through this experience and this too shall pass. I am willing to accept this.” Choose this unconditionally– again, and again.

“There is an immeasurable, unbelievable force that uses every form in your life as a pointer to the support that you need. The support you need is already here! And your role is essential. To be supported, you have to choose to receive the support fully and completely.”

Gangaji, The Diamond in Your Pocket

♥ Drop the expectation that life, or you, should be perfect. With all the distortions we have on Earth, life is not always fair, just, or easy. Earthly life is complicated, at times painful, and very demanding. Nobody on Earth is immune from healing pains. Further, there are many layers we work through during our embodiment: some personal, some planetary and some galactic, and this requires patience. And perpetually seeking perpetual bliss as a state of enlightenment is a misunderstanding of spiritual growth. So, can you love yourself for doing the very best that you know how – right now? Can this be good enough? Can you take responsibility only for healing your own emotions, thoughts and behaviours, and let go of what you cannot control? Can you accept that there is no destination of peace because you are the peace you have been seeking?

♥ Look for the positive and the inspirational. This can be challenging when we feel very listless, yet make the time anyway to consciously bring your attention to that which uplifts you. Just do it! Return to the power of being grateful. Perhaps find a role model who speaks to your heart. It’s not about deceiving yourself and pretending you’re fine. It’s not a substitute for deeper healing work or surrender but a complement. Finding temporary resonance with a higher frequency may not change all that you are feeling in one fell swoop from despair to joy, but it will move you toward it. Each choice-point counts. Do this with consistency.

woman hugging herselfNurture trust in yourself. If you have not had individuals in your life that consistently en-couraged you, then there is a good chance you will be lacking this type of support. However, if you have made it this far in life, no doubt, you have traversed some difficulties and shown yourself your capabilities. Support your fearful or doubting inner child with unconditional love. If you find yourself in the same difficult pattern, it means there is something about it/yourself that you are to learn, witness or master. It does not mean that you are ineffective in some way. Affirm that it’s possible for you to awaken to that. Whatever your challenge, it’s steering you to greater expansion.

Pray and ask for help from your Spirit, or your guides, or any Light Beings that you have a relationship with and that are of 100% Light. If you cannot clear a pattern yourself, reach for support. A request for help in not a sign of weakness, as some people think. This is what ego would have you believe. On the contrary, it is a signal that you are exercising your power of choice to be free of the dense energies draining your life force. It means you believe in yourself and you are choosing to expand your consciousness.

♥ Use the meditation Clearing the Negative Form any time you feel yourself spiral down into discouragement. Practice diligence in using your 12D Shield and make your living space sacred.

tree-of-forty-fruitEvict the Spirit of Discouragement and call upon with Spirit of Diligence. Build a solid foundation for your Spiritual House by focusing your consciousness on that which builds strong moral character. Choose to resign from the darkness of ego. Move your attention to living by Krystic values. Come to know yourself as the Eternal Self, as thriving Living Light. Claim your sovereignty to be full of life!


Do you need support to deal with discouragement or any other painful emotions? Book a healing session to restore your inner peace.

(Amâeil) Melinda Urban All Rights Reserved